Summer so far....

I have been MIA from reading and writing blogs. Life is crazy. Good stuff and Bad stuff has been going on and I wanted to get you caught up. Most importantly my Mom has been in the hospital for over 3 weeks. She has been in and out of ICU several times and has come very close to death on 3 occasions. We are so blessed to still have her with us. She was moved out of ICU into a regular room yesterday and we are all praying she is on the road to healing. Next in line is my Dad, he was also in the hospital. With Mom not home to care for him he had a bad fall. Ok, it actually several bad falls in a row because he kept trying to get up. He ended up with a concussion, 2 broken ribs (broken in half...not fractured....ouch!), bruised collarbones, messed up knee, etc. He basically hurt everything. Yesterday he was discharged from the hospital to a rehab to start his recovery. We are hoping that Mom will be well enough to join him at the rehab soon....and that they can share a room there until they are both well enough to go home.

A few weeks ago my oldest son graduated High School. Yes I am THAT old. Ugh. He is a smart BRILLIANT, handsome, honest, hard-working, young man. I am so proud of him and can't wait to see what the next stage of his life has to offer. He will be going away to college in the fall and majoring in Organic Chemistry. Yeah.....he didn't get his brains from me =D

We added a new member to our household. This is my new baby girl Molly. We got her last Monday and she is totally and completely spoiled already. I love her like crazy and she is filling our days with smiles and laughter. I would say she is perfect except she keeps peeing behind the chair. And she is allergic to beef. We found that out the hard way....ugh.

Hubby has been working like crazy. They are short-handed at work and have him running ragged. I'm not the smartest person in the world but if I had a company I would make sure that more than 4 or 5 people knew how to do each job. But what do I know! lol


We went on our first camping trip of the season. The weather was great, the campground was great.....but both R and J ended up with Pinkeye and couldn't swim for several days. Thankfully they handled that disappointment very well. Other highlights of the week were winning 2 rounds at candy bar bingo and going to see Toy Story 3D. It was the very first time they had seen a movie in a movie theater and they loved it. The movie was great and seeing it in 3D was pretty cool.


So what's new with you? Are you having a good summer so far??

Anyone else ever felt like this??

Almost everyday my husband bugs me about something. He wants to know if I have gone to the bank yet and if I have paid some bills yet. Everyday I say "not yet". The banking and bills belong to Poppop. I haven't done anything with his things since he passed. The checks are sitting here, the pictures we got together for his service, his flag, his bills, his clothes, EVERYTHING is still sitting exactly where they were 6 weeks ago.

Is this normal? I don't really know. But I can say that I understand why people leave their kids rooms exactly how they were. If you don't handle those things, if you don't finalize stuff...then part of them is still with us. I am probably weird, but that is exactly how I feel. If I go to the bank, show them his death certificate, deposit his checks and pay his bills....then I will lose another part of him.

Today I am going to force myself to gather up his banking and do that, hopefully without crying. No promises when I will take care of the clothes, pictures, etc. Right now I'm taking baby-steps.

Chore Chart

Summer is coming. J's last day of school is in about 3 weeks and I have big plans for the boys. For starters we are most likely moving them back into the same bedroom then making R's room into their playroom. I am hoping this will decrease the messiness from the boys. Hopefully. Next up on the list is making chore charts for the boys. I am looking to the blogging community for help.....please give me ideas of age appropriate jobs for a 6 and 4 year old. Right now J knows how to vacuum, sweep, take out trash and recycle, and pick up. R can sweep with a dustpan, help empty the silverware out of the dishwasher, and pick up. I plan to include making their beds each morning, cleaning their room and playroom too. Any other ideas?!?

What are your plans for your kids this summer??

Answered Prayers

God blessed me in a BIG way....head over to my other blog to see how!

Want some?!?

I love Strawberry season in the great state of NJ!!!!!!

A HUGE Favor

I am reaching out to my Blog friends to please come together in prayer.....I need your help. Please read about it HERE at my other blog.

I love you all! Thank you!!!

Blanket

Someone at the nursing home had given Poppop a handmade crochet blanket. It laid on his bed and he used it to keep warm on many occasions. That blanket was over him the day he passed away. The next morning when we went to the Funeral Home they gave me the blanket. I hugged it all the way home and for a long time afterwards. Now that blanket is in my bedroom.

After being with Poppop at the end I couldn't help but wonder about all the people who pass away in nursing homes all alone. So many have no visitors or family. I said to hubby that I wish I could do something for them, but with the boys being young I can't spend time with them like some of them need. The next best thing I could think of was to start crocheting blankets. I learned to crochet when I was a kid but it has been so long that I forgot. But thanks to Youtube I re-learned and am now working on my first lap blanket. I plan to make plenty of them to give to the residents of the nursing home.

Today J asked what I was doing and I told him about my plan. I said some of the people there don't have family to visit and I hope that the blankets will cheer them up. J said " So that means that now with Poppop in Heaven we will get a new one from the nursing home?"

Um.....no. But I guess it was a sweet thought.

Mess

Sorry. My blog is still a mess. A real mess. I CANNOT figure out how to fix it aside from moving all my sidebars to the bottom. Which isnt really a "cure" but at least now the ppl using I.E. can view it. If anyone out there is a blog genius and thinks they can help PLEASE contact me.


Anyhoo...... I am asking you to please join me over at my new blog. My new blood, sweat and tears blog. The one where I tell my secrets and bare my soul. Yeah....it's a little painful but it is something I need to do. So please humor me and head over there......CLICK HERE

Of all the things I have lost....I miss my Mind the most

I hope everyone had a great Mothers Day weekend! My boys woke me up yesterday morning to give me a card and chocolate....and we had gone to lunch the day before, so I had an awesome Mothers Day.Saturday we took my parents to the airport but it wasn't as hard to say goodbye this time because they will be back in a month for C's high school graduation. I still have a hard time believing my first baby is old enough to graduate. But I am so proud of him! He did awesome in HS, and got accepted into several colleges. I am so thankful that he chose one that is close to home (that's the Mom in me not wanting my baby to go far away, lol) His will be majoring in Organic Chemistry......and believe me, he did NOT get his brains from me.

OK, here is the part where I tell you the incredibly dumb thing I did this weekend. I had gotten an invitation to a home party for 6pm on Saturday. I took a shower, got dressed and drove to my friends house. Only her and her husbands cars were there so I immediately figured I had screwed up. But I pulled into the driveway and got out anyway. Her husband was working in the garage so I started talking with him while their son when to get her. Of course she was clueless about a party....she wasn't having one, not even on a different day. Crap! So I apologized and we all laughed. Then I headed home embarrassed and certain that I have lost my mind.
(I found my invite after I got home and saw that it was actually my sister in law who was having the party.....I hope she isn't upset that I didn't show up)

So what did you do for Mother's Day weekend??

And please go check out my new blog

AND stop over to Ca-Joh's blog to help celebrate his 300th post.....HERE

I need help fixing my blog.....anybody?!? Please?!?!???1?

My blog is screwy. Everytime I look at it, it frustrated me even more. My middle and right columns show up BELOW my left hand column. Does ANYONE out there know why that is? Or how to fix it?? Please help me!?!


Even if you can't help me fix it you can still do this.......visit my new "other" blog. 

Thanks!!

My new normal

This is the first time I have felt like blogging. Life is settling down, returning to normal. Not exactly normal, but a "new" normal. This new normal includes lots of reality checks. I find myself going through my day and still including Poppop in my thoughts and plans. Like the other day when I rode past the ice cream stand and thought that I should get a strawberry shake for Poppop.....then corrected myself. It's like I forget for a split-second.......only a split-second. Is that normal? I start to plan my day thinking that I need to head up to the nursing home first, then remember that I never have to go back again. Does anyone else do that?!? How long before I don't include Poppop in my everyday life??

My parents are still here with me, which is awesome. They have been a big help to me. They help with the kids and with household chores. Most of all its nice to have them here just so they are here. You know, when you lose someone you love you want to pull your other loved ones closer.
The boys are doing well adjusting. They know that Poppop is in Heaven with Jesus. I'm really glad my kids can understand that and be comforted by it. God definitely set things in motion within the last year to provide us with what we needed to get through this loss. He has given me a new church family and new friends that are here for me in amazing ways.
So that's it.....my new normal, which looks a whole lot like the old normal. Its just empty in a few spots.

the blog where I whine and cry

People keep asking me how I am doing. I keep politely telling them that I am OK, or that I'm hanging in there. Want to know the truth? I am not OK. I want to throw a temper tantrum. I want to kick and scream and yell and scream. I WANT HIM BACK!  I know I am selfish but I want him back. I want one more day, one more hug, one more kiss. I want him to tell me he loves me one more time. To show me that ornery grin one more time. Or maybe a hundred more times. Everyone says it is OK, he isn't in pain anymore. I know he isn't, I know he is peaceful and happy and looking down on me.

But right now I want him back. I WANT HIM BACK!!!!!!

Rest in Peace Poppop, Rest in Peace

I lost my Poppop on Wednesday. He went home to be with Jesus. I was able to be with him for the last day of his life, and I sat with him and held his hand the whole time. It was a blessing and a heartbreak all wrapped into one. He was such a huge part of my life and I dont think anything or anyone will ever be able to fill that void. Thank you Poppop for being so good to me. I was certainly blessed by having you in my life.

Young Momma is.......

The blogging community never ceases to amaze me. The friends that I have met are such a blessing. One of my very first bloggy friends was Young Momma. For about a 18 months I have "known" her, we have shared, laughed and probably cried for each other. But all this time I never even knew her name.....but guess what?!? She is coming out of the blog closet! She just posted her first Vlog....and it is all about her charity Kim's Angels. Think Jay + St.Baldricks, but pretty (sorry Jay!)

So go now! Check out her newest post, watch her Vlog and check out Kim's Angels and see how they are raising money for Cancer research.

Where is that darn switch?!?

I really don't have anything important to say....but I feel like I should blog anyway. I seem to have gotten away from my old blog habits, reading and writing often. Part of that is because my life is busier now. I'm not sure if you are anything like me but when I have a lot going on in my life, I get very ADD-ish (no offense to ADD patients). I often feel like I can't concentrate, or focus on one topic. The thoughts and ideas I have are all floating around and banging into each other in my brain....all trying to be the first in line. That is exactly how I have been lately. There are only two things that calm my brain down enough to allow me to fall asleep at night. Xanax and reading. Not that all these thoughts are bad thoughts, or that I am upset...sometimes the info is useless shopping lists and goofy stuff.

Is anyone else like this? Anyone else need to read at night or do something else to get their brains to "shut off"??

A Comforting verse

I have a new Bible that I use to complement my NIV Bible. The new one is a Parallel Study Bible. It has 3 versions plus a study bible all listed together. Each 2 page spread lists the exact same verses and you can read them side by side to compare....then read the Study Bible column for a deeper explanation. I LOVE it! I waited and saved my money for awhile to get this book and I am happier than I thought I would be.....but this isn't a blog post about my Bible, it is about a verse I read.
Let me back up a bit. I read a Daily Bible, which gives me part of the Old Testament, New Testament, Psalms and Proverbs every day. I read through the whole Bible last year and then started over again on Jan 1. Aside from that daily reading I also try to read in my NIV and my new Bible. Some days I expand on what I read in the daily Bible, sometimes it has to do with the sermon I heard on Sunday and recently I started to re-read Revelations. (Stay with me Mom....you will want to hear this). Revelations is scary the first time you read it and even more so the second time. But it doesn't have to be scary.....because I found a verse that will take all that fear away....

Revelation 3:10
Because you have kept My command to persevere, I also will keep you from the hour of trial which shall come upon the whole world, to test those who dwell on the earth. NKJV

This means that if we are Christians, TRUE Christians, then we have nothing at all to worry about. The Lord will protect us during those times. Awesome, right?! I love that the Lord can always show us something new in His word, right when we need it.

Weekend/Parents

Hubby took the cover off the camper yesterday and we slept in it last night. The boys were so excited, especially R because this was his first time sleeping on the top bunk. He felt like he was all grown up. From now on the boys have to take turns sleeping on the top bunk. J was NOT happy about this, I guess it felt like a demotion to him, lol Opening the camper is like our family's official start of spring. It feels good and it makes us excited for the warm weather. As much as we all love our camping trips in the backyard we love our "real" camping trips even more.....and we can't wait for the first one. Hurry up Summertime!

My parents arrived safely in Florida today. They are exhausted but happy to be there. My niece is spending the week with them and helping them unpack.

And speaking of my parents, tomorrow is their Anniversary.

Happy Anniversary to the BEST Parents EVER!!!

I LOVE YOU GUYS!

Leave some comment love for Mom & Dad...Thanks!

I'm NO Doctor BUT......

I went to a new doctor today, an ortho. He was supposed to be checking my lower back, my hips, etc. No lie....the man had me undress, get into a gown, bend down like I was going to touch my toes, roll my head around then had me lay flat on the exam table. He grabbed my right foot, flexed it, bent my knee and pushed it towards the other leg. Then did the same with my left foot and leg. That's it. Seriously.
I am not a doctor and other than taking Anatomy/Physiology 1, I have no medical knowledge but I can GUESS that if you are examining a persons back and hips you need to physically SEE them and touch them!!!

At least that is what this uneducated patient thinks.

Ugh.

Tuesday rambling

I don't blog as often as I used to. This is a good thing and a bad thing. Good because I have some other things to do now that take up my time and bad because I miss it. I have been busy with Poppop, with daily work, the kids, etc. On top of all that I haven't been feeling well. My meds are not working very well. I went to my Rheumatologist visit last week. He said my blood work is showing increased inflammation and my joints are swollen. Duh! Thats what happens when you take half my Methotrexate away. So he increased my meth up to 6 a week and will be doing lots of blood work to watch my liver levels. If they increase again then we have to go in a different direction with my treatment. I may go back on Enbrel or I might try something completely new. He also changed my Percocet to Percodan, because the Percocet has Tylenol in it and that is bad for my liver.
I have several friends and family members who have been all but screaming at me that I need to find a pain management doctor. I know that I should. But there is a part of me that hates the idea. Goofy, right?

Poppop is doing OK. He is stable and comfortable. Each day his mental status is different and we never know what to expect. Hubby and the boys went with me after church on Easter Sunday to see him. Unfortunately he was having a bad day and could barely stay awake. I just hope that he was happy on the inside to see us.

I treated myself the other day. I stopped in a Christian book store and found some clearance books for the boys, a tshirt and ring for me. I LOVE my new ring. It is a mobius ring and it has this verse on it... Do Not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with Thanksgiving, present your requests to God. Phil 4:6
I am facing a few trials and this ring will be a physical reminder to hand these trials over to God and to trust he will do what is best.

I hope that everyone is enjoying this beautiful spring day!

Today....the good and the bad

This morning we went to the egg hunt at our church. The boys had a great time and got lots of eggs filled with candy, stickers and toys. The church did a Bible lesson and played games too. Then they served pizza for lunch. Afterwards we went to a couple stores and then home. Me and the boys took naps and Hubby has spent all afternoon working in the yard. The weather is beautiful and aside from one thing I couldn't ask for a better day.

That one thing is pain. My pain level is through the roof this afternoon.....even after taking percocet I am still in severe pain. I know I did too much, and I know it is partially my fault. But I still want to whine a bit.....just so I don't whine to the family. We still have to have dinner (leftover chicken enchiladas and fresh baked beer bread) and dye Easter Eggs.

Tomorrow morning we will have breakfast, the boys will hunt for eggs in the backyard and then we will go to Church to celebrate the Resurrection of Jesus! After church we will go visit Poppop (I got him some Easter balloons....he loves balloons) and then to my Mother in laws for Easter dinner. I know it will be a great day.

I hope you have a wonderful Easter too....and I hope you take at least a few minutes to praise the Lord and thank Him for giving us hope in our lives.

Agape

Parents can understand a little bit, but no one can fully understand what Agape feels like. Agape Love from the Father is an amazing gift that is available to us all. Agape Love is what held Jesus to the cross. Agape is the only way Jesus could bear to suffer the way he did. He did it because he loves us. Your name and my name were on his lips as he hung on that cross.

Please watch this video.....listen to the song and watch the images. And when you see our Lord suffering on that cross please remember that He WAS thinking of you. He loves you THAT much.....THAT is Agape.

Here Burns My Candle.....a Review

Before I start I want to admit that I have not finished this book. I am on chapter 54 and very anxious to get back to reading but I knew I needed to post my review and didn't want to post it late. It is really no excuse but I with Poppop being sick I didn't start reading this book as early as I had planned. However, I CAN review chapters 1 through 53.....

This is my first book by Liz Curtis Higgs, first book based in the 1700's and first book that takes place in Scotland. I didn't know what to expect other than the premise sounded very interesting. It took me a few chapters to get used to the old Scottish tongue, but once I got into it I am having a hard time putting the book down. The story, based in 1745, is about Lady Elizabeth Kerr. She was born and raised in the Scottish highlands as a weavers daughter but moved away to Edinburgh and fell in love with lowlander Lord Donald Kerr. Donald loves Elizabeth but not enough to stay faithful to her and Elizabeth keeps her pagan beliefs a secret as well. In fact, the whole family has secrets. There is drama at every turn and I really feel bad for Elizabeth, who just doesn't seem to fit into her Lowlander family. Her Mother in law, Marjory, doesn't care for her much, mostly due to her being a highlander. A war is mounting outside the Kerr household too. Prince Charles Edward Stuart is fighting to take his rightful place on the throne and when the Kerr men join the Prince's army the Kerr woman learn the hard way how hard things can get when loyal lines are crossed.
Reading this book has made me curious about Scottish history. I was thinking about looking online to see if this war is a true story and what the outcome was, but I didn't want to ruin the ending for myself. But trust me, I will be checking into the history when I'm done reading.
I am really enjoying this book and can't wait to see how it all ends. I still have quite a few chapters left and I know it could go any which way....which makes it a great book. I can't predict how it will turn out. If you like historic novels or romance novels I suggest you read this one, I promise you wont be disappointed.
To learn more about this book or to purchase this book, click HERE.


This was book was provided for review by WaterBrook Multnomah.

Buttons

I met a wonderful blogger named Melissa. She is SO talented and was great enough to make a button for my Scentsy business. In case you arent sure what Scentsy is, they are Wickless Candles. The company is awesome and the products are even more awesome. They have over 80 yummy scents and tons of beautiful warmers that fit any decor. Anyway...back to my post. Melissa made a button for my Scentsy business and I LOVE IT!!! Check it out (and my products!)


Great, right??

If anyone is looking for a blog button, header or makeover I HIGHLY recommend you go visit Melissa. And dont forget to tell her that I sent you!



My Blog has a Facebook page now...check it out HERE

Yes Utah....I AM talking about you!

My parents are on a cross-country road trip. They are moving from AZ to FL and since they have already done a cross country trip across the southern states they decided to tour some cities further north. I don't think they will ever be the same.
I mean that in a good way, let me explain.....I keep getting phone calls from my Mom and they sound nearly the same each time.

Mom: "WOW! OMG! I can't begin to describe how incredible this is! It's beautiful! I thought the mountains in AZ were beautiful but WOW!!! OMG!!! I....I....I can't even describe it!!!"

Me: "That's cool Mom...take pictures. Hey! By the way, I have several Blog friends who live out there......

Mom: "OMG! You should see it!! It's amazing!!! OMG OMG!!! AMAZING!!!"

I am enjoying hearing her tell me about it as much as I would enjoy seeing it. I LOVE hearing her this happy. I can hear the amazement in her voice. And I can't wait to see the pictures!

So to all my Utah buddies! Way to go....your state is awesome!


*Love you Mom!!!!

Daydreams

Do you ever just sit and daydream about all the things that you would do if you had the time or money? Like vacations you would take or home improvements that are itching to get done? Sometimes I like to take a break from the stress of everyday life and pretend that time and money aren't an issue. Then I think about things that I would love to do, such as....
-Redo our upstairs bathroom. Its horrible. Pink tile. Ugh. And the plumbing needs work. Hubby says we need to gut it and start over from scratch. With my imaginary time and money I would like to redo the bathroom in shades of slate blue and lavender. I would love a big tub with jets. A mirror that is low enough for me and the boys to see into (I have to stand on my toes to see into the mirror now....I am only 5 foot tall). Of course this bathroom redo would also include all new fluffy, soft towels, new curtains and rugs. Maybe I could just hide in there for days. It's my daydream, remember =D

-I would love to fix up our other bathroom. It is a small one with just a toilet and sink. I would love to paint it yellow and get a vanity. New floors would be nice too. And just like with the other bathroom I would love to get new towels, rugs, etc. Not sure why I want yellow....but I think it may help the room to feel bigger and brighter.

-Our kitchen would be next. OK, to be fair we already remodeled our kitchen about 7 years ago and I love it. EXCEPT for our stove top, oven and the counter stools at our kitchen bar. The stove top is old and I want a nice smooth top one. They look so nice and so easy to clean. Our oven is well.....small. Very small. And since I love to bake a small oven is a bad thing. Our stools don't quite match our kitchen. They were a cheap impulse buy and I would love have nice, sturdy stools. Ones with either a rush style seat or a wide wooden seat. And maybe they could be green to match my back splash.

-The family room is next on my daydream makeover. I would tear off all the old ugly paneling in the family room and breezeway. To be honest I have a couple of ideas for the walls back there and right now I cant decide. But I do know the panelling has to go....and we need a new rug. Nice Berber carpet. And new furniture, of course. We have unmatching furniture down there and none of is all that comfortable. So add that to the list.

-Our bedroom would look great painted Forest Green with white trim. I have always wanted to do that. I love our bedroom furniture so that could stay, but I would like to get a new mattress that would help Hubby's back. And someday I will own a real Amish quilt.

-Lastly I would have the house either painted or get new siding. Hubby does an excellent job with the yard so that's all taken care of already.

OK, back to reality. Thanks for listening to my daydream makeover. And someday hopefully one or two of these things will happen and I will share them with you!

Do you have any daydreams? Home improvments or trips you would like to take??

Trains, Horses and Spiders.....Oh My!

I spent the day in my favorite place on Earth. Lancaster County PA. We had a picnic at the train yard, rode the train and did some shopping. Hubby got some supplies he needed to work on his trains and the boys got new shirts and books. When we got in the van I noticed a tarantula trying to attack us. OK, it wasn't really a tarantula but it looked like one, and it was a bit smaller. But any spider that is thick and hairy freaks me out. And a spider that is reared back with his front legs in the air like he is going to Chuck Norris us is REALLY going to freak me out. It looked like this....
Hubby killed it. That was the first time he was my hero today. He will do it two more times before this post is over.
We drove to one of our favorite restaurants and I went in to buy some coffee. We wanted to eat at Shady Maple so I just ran in, got my FAV decaf (from Bird in Hand Restaurant, in case anyone needed to know where to get some)and we hit the road again (spider-free this time!)
We did some shopping at Shady Maple market and we brought home some yummy goodies! Pies, fruit breads, whoopie pies, smoked meat sticks, cheese dogs, potato chips and Wilbur chocolate. And yes, we took a cooler, lol. After shopping we went to Shady Maple Smorgasbord. It was packed, which is normal for a Saturday. We usually avoid it during busy times but haven't been in a while so we decided to fight the crowd.
After dinner we headed home where my hero hubby did his second heroic act of the day. A STUPID driver passed an Amish buggy and cut him off. Which spooked his horse. The horse turned into the other lane and fell over. It was horrible to watch. And the poor Amish boy was alone and only about 16 years old. All dressed up like he was going out courting. My husband, who is a farmer and has worked around horses his whole life, went to help the boy. Several Amish men showed up to help too. My Hubby and the other men got the horse untangled from his tack and gear and got him standing up. Thankfully no one was hurt and the horse was only scratched up and bruised a bit. It could have ended way worse.
Once we got home Hubby rescued me from a second and MUCH BIGGER spider in the kitchen. That was heroic moment number 3.


So today was a great day. The weather was great, we had a great time, ate great food and no one was injured. Now if I could only get away from all these spiders....ugh.

He has the BEST ideas =D

The sun is still shining! I think spring may actually be coming soon. The boys played outside all afternoon and they are now watching a movie. I was thinking of all the stuff I should do tomorrow since the weather will be nice again. I had a long list building in my head and I have been trying to figure out what I thought was most important to get done. Then my wonderful Hubby made a wonderful suggestion....He said we should take a day trip to PA tomorrow. I forgot all about my chore list instantly! Of course I would rather spend a warm sunny day driving around Amish country, eating Amish food and shopping. Now I just have to hope that Hubby's headache goes away. He said we will wait and see how he feels in the morning.

Feel Better Hubby!!!! I want to go to PA!!!


On another note....my Parents are heading out tomorrow morning to move across the country from Arizona to Florida. Please keep them in your prayers for a safe trip. Thanks!!

Things are looking Up

I have been on cloud nine all day. The sun was shining and it was warm. The boys have been playing outside until nearly bedtime. And most importantly Poppop is doing better. Out of the last 5 days, he has been alert and talkative for 3 of those days. Saturday he was completely aware of everything, no confusion, nothing. It was AWESOME. A true blessing from God. We talked for hours and even though he is still with me I feel like I have gotten some closure. He was Poppop. Not sick Poppop, not Alzheimer's Poppop but MY Poppop. We laughed and talked for hours. It is truly one of the best blessings I have ever gotten. Sunday he was very talkative but very confused. Today was the same way. But even when he is confused I still love to hear him talk. It has been such a long time since he has really TALKED. Mostly he listens and gives one or two word answers. I'm still amazed at the difference since he was in the hospital. I don't want to fool myself into thinking he is "better". He has cancer and many other medical problems. But just for the time being, none of those medical problems matter. I am enjoying every second I get with him. I left the nursing home today with a huge smile on my face, rolled down the window and sang loudly all the way home. That smile is still on my face. How can you not smile when the sun is shining, your family is happy and Poppop is having a great day!?!

Exergen Temporal Scanner

Before I being this review I want to apologize for being late posting this review. I have been so busy with my Poppop that blogging has had to take a backseat to life. Thank you MamaBuzz and Exergen for being patient with my situation.

How many times have we all had sick kids that fought us when we tried to take their temperature? I know that my kids HATE having their temp taken. And totally forget about using a regular digital thermometer. They wont hold it in their mouths for anything. We tried an ear scanner too, but I was never satisfied with the reading. It always seemed low, we tried it many times and it just never seemed trustworthy.




All that is in the past. No more fights, no more waking them to check their fever, NO more weird readings. Those things are history for us because we are now using the Exergen Temporal Scanner. It is SO easy, SO fast and SO cool. My kids are asking me to check their temps now! When I got my package in the mail I opened it right away. The instructions are simple, load the batteries, remove the cover, and scan. You start in the middle of the forehead and move the scanner to the side and then down towards the hairline. Done. Easy-Peasy. And completely accurate. How awesome is that?!



The Exergen Company uses its patented Arterial Heat Balance system to scan, which takes 1,000 readings PER SECOND! That's like Rocket Science!!! They have perfected this way of reading body temperature and it is considered to be the Most accurate way too. More accurate than oral, rectal, under the arm and in the ear type thermometers.

The thermometer is sold at many major retailers and also online retailers. Click HERE to visit the Exergen website.



Exergen is offering a $5 off rebate coupon....Click HERE for coupon.


This is a Mama Buzz review. The product was provided by Exergen for this review.

Winner Winner!!

This is late. I know, and I am very sorry. Things are crazy right now and I will be honest....I forgot to draw a winner for the Magna Pods giveaway until tonight. So tonight I went to Random.org and let it do its magic.

And the winner is......
Texasholly said...
Looks great! I am so glad to see the metal sheet for the wood medicine cabinet since that is what I have.

Congrats TexasHolly....please email me your mailing info.

Update on Poppop

Poppop got moved back to the Nursing Home yesterday and is now on Hospice. This was a decision that I had to make and I believe it would be exactly what Poppop would want if he was to choose. His mental status changes day to day, and in the last 5 days it has ranged from unaware of everything all the way to perfectly aware and fine.
Yesterday, after he was moved back to the nursing home I was able to spend a few hours with him. It was awesome. He was wide awake, completely aware and knew everything that was going on. We talked and talked. He kept telling me "You're my girl" and "You know how much I love you, right?". He also told me that he had had a dream that he wasn't going to see me or my boys again and that really bothered him. I told him that I would try to bring the boys to see him tomorrow (Sunday) and that made him VERY happy. I knew that taking the boys would depend on how he was doing so I made the plans to go up to see him myself and text Hubby and let him know whether or not to come up with the boys.

The boys didn't get to see Poppop. He was still very awake and talkative but he was also very confused. I didn't mind this, I love having him be able to talk with me but I knew my boys wouldn't understand why he was acting like this. He thought he was still at home, kept asking about his mother who passed about 16 years ago, etc. He told me he knew he was confused and he couldn't figure out when certain stuff happened. Like when did he lose his teeth and things like that. He didn't know who most people were and I had to even tell him where I lived and other things about my life. But he still knew it was Me =D

I am so THANKFUL for these past two days. For having time to talk with Poppop and hearing him tell me how much he loves me. I needed that. God knew that and so did all the people who have been praying for us. Thank you for praying for us and Thank you God for blessing me with this time with him.

From what they tell me, I don't have much time left with Poppop. I am trying to spend as much time as possible with him now, and I have to be honest that I dread hearing the phone ring. I know one of these days that call will come. Please continue to keep us in your prayers.

Poppop

Poppop is sick. Very sick. He went to the ER last night because he was lethargic, weak and pale. The ER ran blood work, x-rays and CT scans. They told me he is dehydrated, has a lung infection and his blood levels are down. Way down. They also found a HUGE mass in his abdomen. And by Huge I mean that when we lifted his shirt we can SEE it from the outside. Yeah. Why didn't the nursing home TELL ME?!?!?!?!?!?!?

After all this is done I will be having a nice long talk with them about this, as I believe that constitutes neglect.

Anyway.....he had two blood transfusions so far and may need more. We wont know for sure if the mass is his cancer has come back since we don't want to put him through any unnecessary procedures to find out for sure.

The ER doc told me if the IV fluids and blood transfusions don't perk him up then I "need to get prepared".

I bawled all the way home and for hours last night. All I can do right now is pray and cry and then pray some more.

Forgive me if I am not around for awhile.....Poppop is my priority.

Thanks!

Magna Pods review and Giveaway!

Does anyone actually HAVE a nice tidy bathroom cabinet? Really? Be honest. I know mine are always a mess. ALWAYS.

Until now. Alright, I still have one messy cabinet but I'm working on it. The nice tidy one got that way because I was given a chance to try a new product called Magnapods. Magnapods are organizers for INSIDE your cabinet. Clever huh? No more makeup brushes and eyeliner laying on the shelf. Now I have places to put my stuff, to keep them neat and organized. The pods are magnetic and stick to the inside of any metal cabinet. Check out how I used them in my cabinet.

I received a MagnaPods Cosmetic Organizer Set #0106 and a MagnaPods Tooth Brush Holder #0201. The organizer set is my favorite, it came with 3 pieces or different sizes. The variety was perfect for what I had, eyeliner, lipstick, brushes, etc.

And don't worry if you don't have a metal bathroom cabinet.....the website offers this steel sheet for wood or plastic cabinets.

If you are interested in learning more or purchasing any of the Magnapods products go HERE.

Now for the best part......the Magnapod company is offering a giveaway to my readers. All you have to do it leave me a comment and you will be entered to win the same products I received. And then your cabinets will be nice and tidy too! I will draw a winner on Sunday March 14th.

I want to thank Magnapods for sending me the products and giving me the chance to review them. I also wanted to thank Business2blogger for this opportunity.

I'm BEGGING !!!!

Whoever parked this steamroller on me (after running me over a few times) needs to remove it. I am not a parking spot and I cannot accomplish everything I need to do when there is a HUGE piece of construction equipment squishing me. And besides that....it hurts.


P.S. I hate Fibro

Snow Day

Good Morning!!

Today is yet another Snow day in the Winter That Wont End. Ugh.

OK, I take that UGH back. Because of the snow I was able to sleep in a bit this morning, which is always a plus. We all need to look at the bright side, right? Some other bright sides to today's snow day.....I don't have to get up from my nap at 3pm to get J off the bus, I get extra cuddle time with my boys, I have a playmate to keep C occupied when I clean the kitchen....alright, that's all I got.

After making the boys go back to bed and stay there until a more respectable hour (8am), we got up and had breakfast (butterscotch krimpets and chocolate milk....I am the coolest mom ever!) and then built a different train track layout. A few games of UNO have been played and the TV is now on with the Imagination Movers sucking the brain cells out of my children's heads AS WE SPEAK. Oh yes! I love me some Disney Channel.

I hope that all my bloggy friends are enjoying their Friday. I hope you are not snowed in with bored children. And I hope you have a safe and wonderful weekend!

Plain Pursuit... Book Review

After reading An Amish Christmas (by Beth Wiseman, Kathleen Fuller and Barbara Cameron) I was excited to get a chance to review another Beth Wiseman book. This book is about a young woman named Carley. She lives in Texas and has had some traumatic things in her life. Not long ago she and her Mother were in a automobile accident. The accident claimed the life of her Mother and left Carley with a terrible secret. When her work begins to suffer she is forced into a long vacation. She heads to Paradise, PA to visit her longtime friend Lillian. Lillian married into the Amish faith and way of life a few years prior. Carley's visit comes at a critical time for Lillian and her family. Lillian's step-son David falls ill and this starts the family into a series of faith-challenging situations. First is the dilemma of running into Noah, David's shunned uncle, who is a doctor in the ER where David is being treated. Next comes the bad news of David's condition and that he needs a specialist and extensive treatment. Noah who misses his family and cares about the well being of his nephew, tries to stay involved in the case....even when the family tries to avoid him.
All this puts Carley in a rough spot, especially when feeling develop between her and Dr. Noah. She feels torn between staying loyal to her friend Lillian and Lillian's family and spending time with a man who she is falling for. Things get even more complicated when they realize that Dr. Noah may be the only one who can actually save David. With every twist and turn, Carley and Dr. Noah become closer and closer. But just as things start to fall into place, Carley's secret may end all her dreams of love.

This story had me hooked from the first chapter on. It is the first Amish book that I have ever read that dealt with the Amish practice of shunning. It was fascinating to read about a part of their lives that we rarely hear about. Seeing how shunning affects both sides made me feel sorry for the families that have gone through this situation.
OK, back to the book.....I loved it. The characters were real and I got caught up in wondering how the story would end up. I didn't want to put it down. I hope I get a chance to read another Beth Wiseman book very soon!

I received this book free from Thomas Nelson Publishers as part of their BookSneeze.com http://BookSneeze.com book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 http://www.access.gpo.gov/nara/cfr/waisidx_03/16cfr255_03.html : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising

The first step is admitting it

Want to know a secret?

Ok....scratch that. It hasn't actually been a secret because I have been in SERIOUS denial about this. I have not told anyone, not hubby, not mom or dad, not Amy. No one. Why? Because if I SAID the words, it would make it too real. If I don't say them, then I can live in my happy little world of denial.

Now your wondering what this is about and could it really be THAT big of a deal?!? Honestly, yes. At least for me. It is scary for me.



I am losing my sense of taste. It started gradually, awhile ago. I originally thought I had burned my tongue and didn't remember doing it. But after weeks turned into months I realized that this wasn't a temporary thing. And it is getting worse.

So I am telling you, then my doc at my next appointment. Maybe there is something that can be done. Maybe it is a side effect from one of the meds I take. Or maybe it is just the Sjogrens progressing.

No matter what it is, I don't like it.


Another confession for today.....eating chocolate burns my mouth. Crazy, right??


Does anyone know where I can trade in this beaten-up, sick body for a new healthy one?

A Tough Decision

I need some input from all the Moms out there. We are facing the upcoming Kindergarten sign-ups and aren't sure what to do. There is no pre-K program where we live, and we cannot afford to pay and send R to one. He will be 5 in August, which is normally when children start Kindergarten. However, I personally don't know that he is ready for school. I have several reasons for feeling this way. Maturity is one of those reasons, a BIG reason. Plus he still takes a 2 hour nap every day and has ZERO interest learning his ABC's etc. All those and a few others make me feel like it would be best to keep him home another year. I know that September is a long way off, and anything can happen between now and then....but if the first day of school was tomorrow I wouldn't feel completely comfortable sending him.



Some people feel I don't work with him enough.....my reply is that you can NOT MAKE a 4 year old learn something that they have no interest in. I do work with him....but I don't push him. I spend a lot of time with him and I try to teach him things. When he wants to....he picks it up. But only if HE WANTS TO. I cant make him. I don't believe anyone could.

I have been talking to a friend of mine who is a Kindergarten teacher in another district. Everything she has been telling me makes me lean more towards waiting a year to start R in school. She said that children should start when they are ready, not when the calendar says they are 5 and old enough to go.

So I am asking for your input.....have you dealt with this issue? Did you wait or send your child when they were 5? Are you still happy with your choice?

In the Land of Odds...DVD review

Product/Book Name: In the Land of Odds, DVD

Auto-B-Good is a five time Emmy Award winning series that can be seen on public television and all around the world. The series is based on the adventures of 9 vehicles, each with their own unique personality, who live in the City of Auto. Each episode is centered around a different Character Development Trait, such as honesty, respect, caring, fairness and many more.

There are currently six DVD’s available (Seasons one and two). Each DVD has four episodes on it.

Ages: 3-10

Price: $7.99

Put out by: Rising Star Studios

Addtional Links for Auto-B-Good include the following:

Youtube Video

Auto-B-Good Site

Purchase In the Land of Odds

Become a fan on Facebook or follow on Twitter

My boys and I couldn't wait to watch this video. The DVD case shows the cutest Cars....Cars that talk and act like people. You know, just like the other Car movie. Whether or not these cars LOOK like those cars, they do have a HUGE difference. These cars teach wonderful lessons to children. The episodes are short and to the point. Which is great for little ones with short attention spans. There were 5 episodes on this DVD and each one was based on showing different important character traits: Dependability, Responsibility, Goodwill, Consideration and Obedience. I really enjoyed the stories and I am always glad to have wholesome movies for my kids to watch.

Out of the 5 stories I enjoyed the Land of Odds episode the best, it was the episode about Dependability. This is the one where one of the cars is transported to the Land of Odds and learns that dependability is not a boring thing. J's favorite was No Rules allowed, which was about Obedience. R said his favorite was also The Land of Odds.

I'm sure that we will be getting more of these Auto-B-Good DVD's in the future. They are great for families like mine!

Thank you to Rising Star Studios and MamaBuzz for sending me this DVD to review.

Somebody Save Me!!!

My husband has been walking around all day with a smile that stretches from ear to ear. He looks like a 16 year old girl who just got her first dozen roses. Did I give him an extra special Valentines gift?!? Heck, no! I don't believe there is anything that I could do that would make him THIS happy.

Now that your wondering I will show you.....THIS is why he is SO HAPPY! and why I need to be saved.....









Oh yes! It's a Man thing. I have to admit that I never even watched this show but my Hubby LOVES the A-Team. So he is a very, very Happy Man.

Free Myspace Layouts

I hope everyone is enjoying their Valentines Day weekend. We don't have any special plans.....tomorrow will be just like every other Sunday. Church and then lunch at the farm with my mother in law. Most Valentines days are just like that.....nothing different than every other day. Hubby was born without the romantic part of his brain, lol BUT there was one Valentines day that he made up for any and all past and future Valentines days. Seriously.

I wasn't expecting anything, since I know that Hubby (boyfriend at the time) didn't "do" Valentines day. He surprised me with Roses in the morning. I was Shocked and Thrilled. Getting Roses on V-day was HUGE! I floated all day, so happy and thankful for those roses. That night we were watching TV and he left the room for a minute. When he came back he had an engagement ring. WHAT?!?! I was in complete shock. Mostly because it was still V-day and I would NEVER expect him to ask me on V-day. Of course I said yes and the rest is history. Very happy history.

Happy Valentines Day Hubby....I LOVE YOU!!!

A Winters Awakening - Book Review

I received A Winters Awakening from TLC Book Tours. It is the newest Amish book written by Shelley Shepard Gray. When they offered it I jumped at the chance because as most people know, I love Amish books. This was the first Amish book I ever read that wasn’t based in Lancaster, PA. This book was based in Sugarcreek, OH. I was pleasantly surprised at how many differences the Amish have in dating practices among other things. In OH, the Amish families are well aware of who their family members are courting. They talk openly about these things and are quite vocal if the don’t approve. They are almost nosy and pushy when it comes to getting their way.
In this story, Joshua and Gretta have been courting for years. It is expected by both families that they will be engaged and married very soon. Unfortunately Joshua and Gretta are both having second thoughts. When Englishers move in next door to Joshua’s family, the tension that was starting to build between the couple becomes a reason to part ways. The story follows along as Joshua and Gretta both try to find their path in life, and to figure out who they want to spend their lives with.

I truly enjoyed this story. It was a nice, quick read and kept my attention throughout the entire book. I was left guessing as to what would happen clear up until the end.

Thank you to TLC Book Tours and Shelley Shepard Gray for sending me this book for review.

If you are interested in more information about the author or the book please click the links.

Dear Cupid

Dear Cupid,


If you are reading this and wondering what would make me SWOON on Valentines day.....let me just tell you that I don't need chocolate......I don't need flowers......oh no! this Valentines day the ONLY thing I want is ...........


Someone to mop my floors.



Romantic, huh?

What do you want this Valentines Day???

Angels

I was asked to review the book "Angels" by Dr. David Jeremiah. Angels was very informative, giving lots of data on where to find Angels in the Bible. The author explains the hows and whys of what Angels are doing on Earth and what they aren't doing on Earth. It clears up a lot of misconceptions and gives new insight into a topic that most people find fascinating.

While I did find the book full of new information, I didn't find it easy to read. To me it was almost like reading a textbook....like it was just data, data, data and nothing to relate it to our lives. Maybe this was the intention of the author or maybe it was just how I "took" the book.

Would I recommend this book? It depends. If I had a friend who loved Angels and found them a very interesting subject then yes, this book would be great for them to read. For someone like me who isn't that interested in them, then I wouldn't recommend it.

I have a copy to giveaway.....and I will choose a winner next Friday Feb 12th. Just leave a comment to be entered to win.

This book was provided for review by the WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group.High res cover art as well as author photo are available upon request. Thanks and happy reading!

I am Second

I'm heading to see Poppop in a few minutes. And running to the store for some last minute stuff we need before we get snowed in for the weekend. Before I go I wanted to share a website that I love. Please take a few minutes to watch the videos on the website. Even if you only have time for one or two. They are VERY powerful. I have added the most recent video below.


I am Second

My confession.....

I have a confession. But before I confess I want to share something about myself.
I love to Bake. LOVE IT! Baking to me is like therapy, love and a hobby all rolled into one (get it?!? rolled....ha ha ha)
I bake when I am upset, happy, sad, hungry, bored, and just about every other emotion under the sun. When I think of doing things for other people the first thing that pops in my head is "what should I bake for them?"
Seriously, at this moment I have a triple layer oatmeal and chocolate bar cookie baking. I can handle stuff like that. I LOVE stuff like that.

Now that I have told you HOW much I love to bake I will tell you my dirty little secret.....

I am intimidated by yeast.

Yeah, I know. What kind of baker am I?
I don't make bread, unless it is in a bread machine. I don't make rolls, cinnamon buns, nothing like that. But I WANT to.
I just haven't gotten over my "fear" of yeast.

I really want to overcome this....I want to make nice, soft fluffy dinner rolls.......yummy cinnamon buns, etc. So I am asking.....please tell me any easy, starter recipes you might have....foolproof ones so I don't lose my nerve.

Thanks!

Please excuse this interuption....

OK, first let me apologize for my whine fest yesterday. I know this wasn't the first time that I have blogged on a "bad day". This is turning out to be like "drunk-dialing"....because after the fact I HATE that I whine so bad about it. On most days I have it under control...or at least I think I have it under control. But on those days when the pain wont end, and I am very, very medicated I ramble on into a wimpy whine that can be heard for miles and miles on this thing. Ugh.

So I am sorry. And if anyone has any ideas how to block myself off of blogger on bad days I would love to know. It's not like I can hand the keys over to hubby.....the laptop has no keys.


As you can tell today is a better day. The pain is tolerable. Thanks for all the well wishes and prayers! I love you guys!!!!

Waiting

For the LORD is a faithful God. Blessed are those who wait for Him to help them.

Isaiah 30:18

This is me today. Waiting. Waiting for relief. Even my percocet isn't helping much today. I spent most of my day laying on the couch. The rest of it laying in bed. I am not going to try and explain my pain, it wouldn't help and you wouldn't understand.

How about instead of understanding you just send a few prayers my way? Please?!?

Today is one of those days when it is hard to stay focused on God. Really Hard. And even though I want to....I find myself feeling negative thoughts. No matter how faithful you are, pain will do that to you. So then I feel pain AND guilt.

I know I will get through today. And tomorrow could be the same, better or worse. I will just deal with that tomorrow. Right now I am doing all I can, which is basically breathing and blinking. And typing....but not for much longer.

Thanks in advance for your prayers!

Wendy Loves Me!!!

Look!!!

Wendy gave me this awesome and VERY pretty award....cool, huh?!?

So now I have to list 10 things about me....and trying to find ten things about me that I have ALREADY told you is hard. But I'm going to try.....

1. I can't sleep if my feet are covered with a blanket or sheet. I honestly feel like I am suffocating if they are under the covers. My dad is like this too, so I know I'm not completely alone on this.

2. I have a brother. Did I ever tell you that before? We never got along growing up and we still aren't close. But since he lives really far away and we basically only talk on the computer or by texting, we get along just fine now =D Love you Jeff!!

3. My hubby eats bread with peanut butter whenever he has vegetable soup. GROSS!! I know this isn't technically about ME...but it grosses me out so that makes it about me.

4. Roast Turkey (or chicken) with stuffing and gravy is my MOST FAVORITE MEAL. But it has to be bread stuffing. I wont eat that crap with fruit, nuts or oysters in it. Just bread, onions and celery!

5. I don't really like Chocolate ice cream. I know...Shocker! right? I would rather have vanilla with chunks of chocolate or whatever. Its not like I wont eat it...but I would rather it be at least mixed with vanilla ice cream.

6. I had 2 iguanas, a snake, a many guinea pigs growing up. Plus cats and dogs. I love pets! I named all my iguanas "Bobo" and I never had more than one at a time.

7. I would rather drink water than soda or juice. I hate carbonation and don't like how juice makes you feel even more thirsty. At least I feel that way after juice.

8. I collect Boyd's bears (plush). I lost count a long time ago.

9. I snore.....bad. that's all I am saying about that.

10. I don't pee my pants anymore since I had my surgery in August....Yay!!

So there you go....even more useless information about me. I hope you enjoyed it!

Now I need to pick some very deserving bloggers to pass this award along to....

Rebecca at Knit by God's Hand

Amy at Amy's Awesome Nest

Georgie at Decisionally Challenged

The Girl with Flour in her hair at Peeling an Orange with a Screwdriver

Missy at Is it Just Me??

2010 Get to know you Meme

My head is empty of all blog ideas so I stole this from M-Cat.....I'm sure she wont mind.

Welcome to the new 2010 edition of Getting to Know Your Family and Friends: The Blogger Version. Make sure you comment and let me know you're playing!

What's your occupation right now? Official Title: Mom. Plain and simple.

What color are your socks right now? White. Very, very white because I bought them yesterday.

What was the last thing you ate? Butterscotch Krimpet Tastykake

Can you drive a stick shift? Yes. I had 2 cars with stick in my life. I LOVED driving stick, it is so much fun.

Last person you spoke to on the phone? Hubby

Do you like the person who sent this to you? Well, no one sent it to me but I really do like the person I stole it from =D

How old are you today? old enough to have a High School senior. Ugh. I am 38.

What is your favorite sport to watch on TV? Nascar....don't judge!

What is your favorite drink? water or decaf iced tea...NO LEMON!!

Have you ever dyed your hair? Yes, ever since I was about 13 or 14 years old.

Favorite food? Chocolate and Cheese...but not together.

What is the last movie you watched? I went to the movies to see New Moon with Amy in December. The last movie I watched at home was Cloverfield and I watched that with Hubby.

Favorite day of the year? Thanksgiving

How do you vent anger? Call my Mom or Amy and vent. Or cry in the shower.

What was your favorite toy as a child? I was a Barbie girl...I had Barbie everything!

What is your favorite season? Spring....it is beautiful, warm (not too hot) and we open up the camper.

Cherries or blueberries? I like both, but would probably pick Cherries

Living situation? Living at home with Hubby and my two youngest boys. My oldest moved to his dad's house a couple years ago.

When was the last time you cried? I ALMOST cried on Friday when I left my doctors appt.

What’s on the floor of your closet right now? There is a floor in there?!?! Really?

What did you do last night? Dropped the boys off at God Squad (youth group) and went to my new Bible study group. Then came home and watched TV with Hubby.

What are you most afraid of? My kids getting sick....Autoimmune diseases are hereditary so this is a constant worry for me.

Plain, cheese, or spicy hamburgers? extra cheese please!!!

Favorite dog breed? English Bulldogs (had 2 growing up) and Boxers (ours died in 2002)

Favorite day of the week? Sunday

How many states have you lived in? 3....Delaware, NJ and Massachusetts

Diamonds or pearls? Diamonds!!....does anyone really LIKE pearls?

What is your favorite flower? Sunflowers

Which of your friends in this distribution list have you had the longest? This didn't come from an email so I will say that the bloggy friend I have known the longest would be Amy.


Now - feel free to play along! I'd like to know more about each of you!




I also want to let everyone know that I put WV back on my comments because I was getting several spammers comments.....I didn't know what else to do. Anyone else know how to get rid of them besides word verification??

Tuesday nonsense

Hi Bloggy Friends! I hope everyone is doing well and is healthy. I don't really have anything important to write about but I wanted to write something.

I will start with this little gem. Hubby came home from work last night, ate dinner and then got on the computer. He set his FB status to say what he had for dinner because it was SO good.
And yes, I MADE that dinner. Even if he didn't tell ME how much he enjoyed it...I got the message loud and clear. Thanks Hubby!!

My friend Amy's Dad needs prayers. He is going for a cardiac cath on Thursday. They know he needs some kind of treatment and the cath will give them a better idea what he needs. Please say some prayers for his healing and for the whole family to have peace during this hard time.

I feel like I am coming down with a cold. That by itself isn't too bad. I can handle that....a little Nyquil and I'm all set. The problem is that my body doesn't handle new stuff well......which means that it is already reeling from missing my Methotrexate a few days ago and now it is fighting a cold. Not good. I am in so much pain and so weak I can barely move off the couch. I did manage to throw dinner in the crockpot. Now I am counting down the minutes until R's nap time. I hope to sleep until J gets home and then continue to rest on the couch. I have pain meds available to me but I don't like to take them during the day. I am tired enough without them and I am always afraid I might fall asleep or miss something. So I will just curl up and wait until bedtime for my pain meds. Ugh.


C is a senior in High School. This is his last year on the Robotics team (not a HS team, a regional team but after HS they have to become mentors and not actually compete). In a couple months they will be going to upstate NY for a big competition. We have NEVER been able to go. This year I am all but begging Hubby to find a way for us to go. This is it.... His senior year. His last year to compete. Our last year to go to this event to cheer them on. Hubby is trying his best to find a way. I will let you know if this works out for us.

Hmmmmm.....I cant think of any more nonsense to write about. I'm not sure if that is because life is pretty boring right now or because I am so tired. Either way I'm done. Its nap time.



Bye!!!

Liver, Methotrexate and listening to my own advice

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. James 1:2-4

I have been trying my best to accept things that happen as God's will. To be ok and to KNOW that God has a plan. It is not my place to ask questions. I am just supposed to lean on Him.
OK God....I am leaning. Help me to not doubt. To not question. To not wonder. To give it all up to you. Help me please. Amen.

Friday I went to see my Rheumatologist. If you have followed me for awhile you will remember last spring when I came off the Enbrel for a few months so I could start on the Methotrexate. This was my Rheumys idea. He thought my PCP jumped into the Enbrel too soon. I did it. I had several BAD months. It took nearly 6 months of building up the Methotrexate in my system along with SEVERAL dosage increases to get where I was starting to feel better. To notice a difference. It didn't "fix" me, but it helped. And believe me.....any help is a good thing. When I saw him on friday he told me that the Methotrexate is hurting my liver. And he told me to SKIP my next dose.....have bloodwork next weekend and then resume on the Methotrexate at HALF doses.

Really? REALLY? I know I can't risk damaging my liver. But I also know that a lower dosage doesn't help me. Maybe on the inside it does....maybe it helps stop my disease from affecting my internal organs. Maybe is stops it from progressing. But it DOESN'T help me FEEL better. It doesn't help me get out of bed in the morning. It doesn't help me to get through my day or take care of my kids.

So here I am.....freaked out that the next month or two (or more!) will be bad. Hubby told me that maybe this will work out so that I can go back on the Enbrel (which helped). He also said that maybe this is God's will and it will work out for a few other things going on in our lives. Yes....my hubby said that. Hearing him think like that warmed my heart....and helped me to get through a very dark and sad friday afternoon.

I have to trust in the doctor....because I don't want liver damage. I WILL make it through no matter how rough the next month or so will be. I have great people in my life who will help me. And I have God. and God has me.

God's Blessing

Within the past year we have faced some difficult hurtles. Challenges that keep us on our toes and wishing for a reprieve. In spite of all this I have seen a steady stream of blessings coming to me. Of course I know that everything is a Blessing from our Heavenly Father. I think the blessings that have most affected me within this past year have been the friends that God has given me. There are 5 women in my life right now who are amazing and each of them blesses my life in a different way. Each of them fills a different need in my life.

I will start with Amy. I knew Amy back in high school. We weren't really friends.....I only knew her because she dated my brother. I liked her, but we traveled in different circles. We had different friends....and to be honest I NEVER spent much time with my brother. We didn't see or talk to each other in years, not until we started talking on FB. Not only do we enjoy each others company, our kids play together and we are Neighbors. Right around the corner. Close enough to walk or ride bikes (well....if I could ride my bike). Amy is the friend I turn to first. Good, bad, happy or sad.....she gets the call or text right after Hubby (and sometimes Mom....Hi Mom!!). She is my shoulder, my cheer section and sometimes my conscience. I will ask her opinion on everything. Nothing is off limits.

Next is MA. She was my best friend from 8th grade through High school. We were inseparable. Either we were at my house or we were at her house. Always. It was like we were joined at the hip. She was the sister I never had. Things happened and we lost touch. I NEVER stopped thinking about her. I thought about contacting her family to find out about her. But after all those years it was awkward. I knew it was wrong that we weren't still connected at the hip. But making that first step toward contacting a friend is hard. So I started talking to her brother and EVENTUALLY we found each other on Facebook. Again....Facebook gave me back an awesome friend. MA is THE funniest person I have ever known. It is impossible for me to be in a bad mood with her around. She makes me laugh and makes me happy. Seriously, her just being in the same room fills me with joy. It may sound weird, but it is true.

My third amazing friend is Valerie. She is another one of my brother's ex girlfriends....and another friend I found through facebook. I loved Val when she dated my brother. She was one of those bubbly people. And so darn cute! Now Val is a beautiful Christian woman who lets me vent and lets me be her shoulder too. We could talk for hours and feel like we haven't had enough time together.

The next two friends are new friends. I met one in the fall and the other one last week. But I still consider them to be great friends that I couldn't live without. They both were sent to me from God.
I met both Lorraine and Lori through my MOPS group. OK, not really....at least not directly. You see, after I started going to MOPS I decided to try out that church. I needed a new church, desperately. But that's a different post. My very first Sunday I felt overwhelmed and lost. I was trying to get my boys into the correct Sunday school classrooms and was unsure about what I would do for the next hour. I met Lorraine in the hallway. She basically grabbed me up and said "you're coming with me" . She hasn't been able to get rid of me yet! One day her daughters soccer team was playing my sons soccer team and we had the chance to talk. Really talk. We both have a similar situation with our oldest sons. Just knowing someone who understands how I feel and has been through similar things was like a weight lifted off of me. Finally, someone got it. She "got" me.

My most recent friend is Lori. God crossed our paths at a MOPS play date. While all the other moms were chatting in the other room and the kids playing around them....we took our boys out to her garage to bounce in the bounce house. I don't remember who started talking first but it doesn't even matter. All that matters is that we clicked. In a big way. We clicked about many things but mostly we clicked when it came to our faith. And we both wanted and needed a close friend to share our growing faith. Today R and I went back for a play date. Only this time it wasn't the whole MOPS group. It was just us and our boys. And it was perfect. We talked for hours. It felt like I had known Lori for years. I'm comfortable around her. We both can open up and share. How great is that?!? We made plans to meet every week, so the boys can play and we can spend time together with God. Bibles open, prayers being said and hearts being filled.
It doesn't get much better than that!

Believe me when I say that I pray thanks to the Lord everyday. I thank him for my family, friends and everything God does for us. And I always, always say extra prayers for these special friends. Because I love them....and I need them.

Bad Denise

I haven't been a very good blogger lately. I haven't been a very good blog reader either. Sorry. I really don't have a good excuse. Unless being a mom, wife and patient count.
Do they count?
OK......just so you can stop wondering this is what has been going on in my life.

I visited with friends. Several friends. Old friends. It was awesome seeing each and every one of them.

R peed his pants in Walmart. Yeah, I thought we were over that too. Obviously not.

J has a bad cold. Bad. Poor J.

Poppop isn't doing very good. It isn't anything I can put my finger on....I cant say it is this or that. But he just isn't doing well. He is weak. He looks bad. I'm worried.

I have been to the dentist several times since the beginning of the month....with several more visits to come.

I found out that John Hopkins in MD has an entire department dedicated to Sjogrens. I wish I lived closer to Baltimore.

My husband is back to working full time. That is a huge blessing BUT he isn't in his normal position at work. He HATES what he is doing now. He HATES going to work and he HATES the thought of doing this for several more months.

I have had some good days and some bad days. Today is a bad day. I'm in pain. Apparently my body doesn't like when I am super busy.

hmmmmmm.....yeah, that's it. Boring, right?

I read this passage this morning and it stuck with me....

I know the Lord is always with me.
I will not be shaken, for He is right beside me.
No wonder my heart is glad, and I rejoice.
My body rests in safety.
Psalm 16:8-9

She is Awesome and so is her view!!

I'm at Amy's. Blogging. Cause she rocks!! She actually took a vacation day so that me and my boys could come play at her house on the river all day. Too bad it's cold out. Too cold to actually be outside to enjoy the river. But I am sitting here typing on my laptop and can see the River. ALL OF IT! Awesome! I want to live on the River. She is SO lucky!


Thanks for spending the day with us Amy and J.

I R smart

I'm either half brain dead or have too much on my mind. Either one is not good. Want to know what brilliant thing I did this morning? I spent over 5 minutes looking for my sweatpants. The sweatpants that I KNEW I had washed and folded yesterday. I looked through 2 baskets of folded laundry. I looked in the basement. I looked in my bedroom and the bathroom. And finally.....finally I found them.


I was WEARING them.

Yep....that's the kind of day I am having.

Please pray!

I just heard that one of the Robotics teams that my son's team competes against had a terrible bus accident. One student was killed and 17 others were injured. They are Team 3125 from the Hartford, CT area.
Please pray for the students, mentors and families.

Toothache

I went Wednesday for a root canal. The whole idea of having a root canal scared the crap out of me (not literally, thankfully!) but my Dentist is pretty cool and hands out Valium scripts to chickens like me. So I took my Valium and headed in there. He drilled on me for nearly 2 hours....YES! I said 2 hours people. THEN he told me that my nerve canal was too thin (apparently its the only part of me that is thin) and that I needed to see a specialist. What?!? Really? It took him nearly 2 hours to figure that out?!? So he filled the tooth in, told me he wasn't charging me and gave me the number of a specialist. When I got home one of my other teeth started hurting. That tooth also needs a root canal. Sjogrens is ruining my teeth. There is no way to avoid it. I use prescription toothpaste and everything but eventually the Sjogrens will win. Dentures are in my future....like it or not.
Ok, back to my toothache story. This other tooth hasn't stopped hurting. I called the dentist yesterday to boo hoo....his office called me prescriptions for an antibotic and vicodin. Even with the vidocin I am in pain. And I don't see the dentist until next Thursday.
So please...pray for me and my stupid teeth. Pray that I get some relief from this toothache. Please.
Me and my tooth appreciate it.

My new Love

Usually me and Hubby combine any money we get for Christmas and use it on bills, groceries, the kids or whatever. This year Hubby wanted to add some trains to his "collection". We are a train loving family so I was all for it. I love seeing him and the kids get all excited watching the trains. Hubby knew I have been wanting a Sony eReader for awhile but it wasn't in our budget. BUT after Christmas he told me to use my Christmas money to get one for myself. YAY! BestBuy had a great sale plus free shipping AND Hubby had a gift card so I could afford one. AWESOME! I even got a pink one. I puffy heart my new eReader. I joined our local library and can download and read ebooks FREE! How great is that?
So if you can't find me.....look on the couch, under my new blanket....I will be reading with a HUGE smile on my face.




Oh...and I have to give a big lovey dovey shout out to Amy who is working some serious magic turning books into pdf files for my new ereader. Amy I puffy heart you too!!!