Im back

I was blog-free all weekend. And aside from missing all of you terribly, it was a very nice weekend. Friday Amy and her son came over to hang out for awhile. Then after she left an old friend came to visit. She was my best friend growing up. We were inseperable. That is until near the end of High School. She went to Catholic school and I went to public school. Plus her family moved about 20 minutes away. Which to a kid with no drivers license is HUGE. So we started to slip apart and eventually boys got in the way and poof...we lost touch. Now flash forward over 15 years and little thing called Facebook and we are right back to being friends again. She was here on friday until 12:30am, then came back Saturday morning for a few hours before heading back home to VA. Hopefully she will be up on Easter weekend. Sunday was ok. Instead of me not dragging my butt out of bed it was Hubby who had a major headache. By lunchtime he was finally feeling better and we headed over to the farm for lunch and family time.

We had a great day and the kids played until they dropped. The weather was so nice, we even got to fly kites in the afternoon.
So that was my weekend....I really think that more happened but I can't think of it right now.
Happy Monday!!

Today and Days of Grace

Hellloooooooooo....I'm back and feeling fine.
Everything went perfectly today and I am really glad it is over. Honestly the procedure was nothing. I got knocked out and dont remember a thing. Much easier than a pap-smear, lol. The prep....well, thats another thing all together. It was rough. And I didnt sleep. And I hated not eating. Fat girls like to eat....not survive on clear liquids. So Im glad that is over. Afterwards Hubby took me to Olive Garden and I pigged out! Then I took a nap :-) Tonight I was picked up by C who drove me to his Induction Ceremony into the National Honor Society. Yay C! Im so proud of you! Afterwards C, his dad and stepmom and I went for ice cream. So I ate enough today to last for days! Now Im watching tv and going to rest on the couch with my feet up. (Oh....what do you think of my new haircut??)

Today I found Grace in....

-Being done my prep!

-Seeing my firstborn inducted into the NHS. He certainly was not born with my brains....thankfully!!

-FOOD....lots of yummy, wonderful food.

-Knowing I will see my childhood BFF tomorrow after 15 long years.

-Seeing God answer my prayers again and again. God is Good!!

Good morning.....maybe

I cant sleep. Sleep is for people who Haven't drank HalfLytely Bowel Prep Kit. Ugh. At this point I am looking FORWARD to my colonoscopy.....because I will be ASLEEP. And then afterwards I can eat. I seriously love food. And I miss it. I know it has only been since midnight on Tuesday. But everyone in my house keeps eating in front of me. Do you know how many cookies my kids ate yesterday?!? Anyway, I am way off my reason for this early morning post. Yes, I can't sleep but I am not here for sympathy. Nope, I am here to ask everyone to pray for Jillene. She is having her surgery this morning and needs prayers. Prayers that everything goes as planned. Prayers for a speedy and pain-free recovery. So get to it....start praying. Thanks!!

TMI and other crap

Im on clear liquids only today. Want to know why? Because I have to prep for my colonoscopy tomorrow. Sounds fun, huh? I am thinking that the prep is probably worse than the test, since I will be sleeping during the test and wont know if they stick the tube in the right hole or anything. Gross. Ugh. Im hungry and it is going to be a long, long day. I just hope some new magazines come in the mail today so I have something to look at while I spend my entire evening in the potty.

Happy Wednesday.

Monday night Sleep-over

Last night me and the boys had a sleep-over in the family room. We pulled the sleeper out of the couch and made the bed. Then cozied up to watch a movie and eat popcorn. Then we all cuddled up and went to sleep. J on one side, R on the other and me in the middle. And yes, I was squished all night but it was still super fun and totally worth it. I woke up several times and had hands and/or little faces in my face....but being that close and hearing their little breaths was AWESOME. Each time I woke up I said a prayer and thanked the Lord for giving me such precious little boys. I can't wait to do it again. (and Hubby took a pic of us in bed but I didnt get a chance to download it yet....but I will post it asap)

Sunday night Days of Grace

I hope everyone had a great weekend. The weather here has been great and we had a very busy weekend. Saturday we drove up to Philadelphia to watch C's Robotics Team compete at Temple University. They made it to the quarter-finals. We stopped at Reading Terminal Market for lunch then headed home. Me and Hubby were both sorry we didnt take the wheelchair....I totally overdid it. And I am still paying for it. Today I couldnt get out of bed and get moving so I missed church. But after some meds and a nap I did make it to my MIL's for a late lunch. J flew his kite and R played in the dirt. I mainly sat on my butt....thats about all I can do today. But I wouldnt change anything, it was a great weekend.

Today (and yesterday) I found Grace in....

-Seeing the Robotics competition (this was the first one we got to this year)

-Ice cream at my MIL's this afternoon

-Nice, warm sunshine

-Meeting more bloggy friends.....I am really enjoying the Ultimate Blog Party.

-Seeing Jay's bald head....Way to Go Jay!!

-Psalm 36:7 God, your love is so precious! You protect people in the shadow of your wings.

-Psalm 37:5 Depend on the Lord; trust Him, and he will take care of you.

I know that was 7 instead of 5, but I didnt do them yesterday :-)

Friday Days of Grace

Hello Bloggy Friends. Today was great. I met alot of new bloggy buddies from the Ultimate Blog Party. Needless to say, I spend alot more time than usual on the computer too. Bad Denise! This afternoon was nice too. I got a nap with R and then we all went out to dinner before going grocery shopping. I also needed to pick up some prescriptions tonight and found out that there is a national narcotic shortage. Seriously. Crap. That means my friendly pharmacist handed me my Percocet script back and said "Sorry...cant help you with that one". Ugh. I did call around and find another pharmacy that still has the medicine. Thank God. So tomorrow morning I will be heading there to get it filled before someone else gets the pills. I hope this situation gets remedied soon....for me and all the other chronically ill people in the US. Tomorrow we are headed up to Philly to watch C's Robotics team compete. I don't think they did very well in competition today, so I am hoping tomorrow is better. Maybe we will bring them good luck.

Today I found Grace in....
-Hubby suggesting we go out to dinner so I wouldn't have to cook

-Finding a pharmacy that still has percocet

-the boys being super-good at the restaurant

-Staying WAY below budget at the grocery store

-Meeting lots of new bloggy friends!

Let's get this party started....

5 Minutes for Moms Ultimate Blog Party starts today....head on over to participate in the fun!
And I would like to welcome any new bloggy friends who are stopping over from the Party. Look Around....pull up a chair and have a cup of coffee with me. I even have chocolate cake to share. I would love it if you read a few of my older posts....and follow me if you enjoy them. There is more love, fun and drama to come. You will see that I am a normal, overworked stay at home mom who loves her 3 boys, her husband and loves God. I am also fighting the good fight against a few Auto-Immune Diseases. They do their best to keep me down but I keep fighting to be as normal as possible. So thats me in a nutshell.
Please, please, please....leave me a comment so I can head over to your blog and show you some comment love too.


And here is my list of prizes that I am hoping to win (this is a required list)
#8 Stuck on you labels
#9 Childs Crayon Apron
#12 Gift Cert to the Gift Closet
#17 Bracelet and earrings
#18 T-shirts
#19 Target gift cert
#21 Target Gift Cert
#22 Target Gift Cert
#26 Target Gift Cert
#32 Book
#36 Book
#40 Grande Bag
#56 Box of Art Supplies
#58 Kitchen Aid Mixer
#60 Pepsi Tote
#68 Book gift cert
#70 Churros
#85 Family pillow
#88 Carrabbas gift cert
#89 HomeGoods gift cert
#91 Target gift cert
#103 Surprise box
#118 Old Navy gift cert
#119 Journals

Unplug 3/27/09

Kimba at a Soft Place to Land has announced March 27th as Unplug Friday. Its a day to step away from the unneccesary distractions in our lives and spend a whole day focusing on what really matters. For some (me) the computer is a distraction, for others it may be tv or a blackberry or whatever. Please join me next friday by Unplugging.

Days of Grace

We went to Carvel tonight for some yummy cool treats. They even have a jimmie (sprinkle) dispenser on the wall where you can pick your colors and dispense them yourself. In fact, R, J and I ate half our ice cream and then added MORE jimmies! This was a the perfect end to a long, hard day. Thanks Hubby!!
Look at that fluorescent pink ice cream! It was cotton candy flavored and little R ate every bit of it. Daddy helped him eat the bowl.
J had birthday cake flavored ice cream and He also finished all of his PLUS the bowl. We all have overly full bellies tonight. But we have smiles on our faces too.

Today I found Grace in....

-Two very well behaved little boys.

-Bloggy friends who support me during rough days

-Catching up with an old friend (even if it is only on IM)

-Bedtime isn't too far off

-Knowing that I can handle bad days with God's help.

Note to Self/Others

Note to Self:
No blogging before you are fully wide awake and/or while waiting for meds to work.

Note to Others:
So sorry I wrote such a down and depressing blog this morning. I'm feeling a little better physically and a lot better mentally. Thanks for letting me vent <3

Warning.....Whining Ahead

Here is my Boo Hoo list. I'm dumping it here so I can hopefully go about my day without dragging this list around and burdening my family.

I am tired and can't sleep.
I am hurting and my percocet is not working fast enough.
I hate days that START with taking pain meds, it only goes downhill from here.
I need a shower. Most people take showers for granted, or as a relaxing part of the day. I see them as an obstacle. An energy sucker. Do you realize how much work goes into standing that long and washing yourself? Seriously, it is an EFFORT.
It's only been 1 1/2 weeks since I stopped the Enbrel..... I have 7 weeks until my Rheumy appointment. I will start Methotrexate after that....and I'm not sure how long it takes to work.
I'm trying not to cry thinking about the next couple months.
I have a sink full of dishes and 3 loads of laundry that need folding.
My 5 year old was trying to vacuum the floor yesterday....yes, it IS that bad.
I wish my mom lived closer so I would have some help around the house. (sorry mom)
Hubby is TRYING to be ok with all this. But having a hard time.
He got word that his department might be cutting back soon. Probably by fall. We are barely scraping by with his paycheck now. How will we do it on 32 hours a week??
The new Fibro drug got approved....but I can't start it until AFTER I see how the Methotrexate works. Who knows how long that will be. I hate waiting.
R has a doctor appointment today. That means I have to get dressed.
Are you tired of me complaining yet?

Thanks for letting me complain....and I'm sorry to dump all this on you. On a lighter note I saw this and thought it was cute. I wish it was on a sticker so I could put it on my van.

Way to Go MARTY!!!!!

Not sure if anyone else follows Hockey....or happens to be a NJ Devils fan. But I am. And Martin Brodeur became the All time Win leader tonight. 552 wins. Most Victories EVER by a Goaltender.
He is the best Goaltender EVER. He is also 4 games shy of being the All time Shutout leader. I love Marty!

Just needed to fly my Hockey freak flag for a bit...thanks!

Days of Grace....early edition

Hubby is on daywork and I will most likely not be on the computer anymore today. So I wanted to make my list before I sign off....
Today I found Grace in

-an empty kitchen sink (and it shines too!)

-The boys playing nicely together all day

-the sun shining

-Watching the boys play in the backyard

-Romans 8:28 And we know that all things work together for good for those who love God, who are called according to his purpose

Tuesday Tribute...Facebook Flair

Yet Another Jay and Deb Production.Besides my obsessive relationship with blogging and Facebook, I also have a very unhealthy relationship with Flair. I do not poke, I do not save the rainforest, have Eggs, take every quiz, etc, etc....but I do love me some Flair! Here are some of the goodies I found the other day....enjoy!

Flair gives good advice...


Shows your likes and dislikes




Tells your friends how much you like them (or not)


Gives health advice

Describes me
Praises God


See....aren't you hooked now too?!? And don't forget to go over to Deb and Jays blogs.....Jay needs donations for his St. Baldricks head shaving day.
Happy Tribute Tuesday!

TMI

I had to pee. And of course J followed me. I never get to go by myself, but I guess all moms have this problem. It just got worse from there:

J: (pointing at my crotch) whats that?
Me: What?
J: That?
Me: My legs
J: No! That!
Me: Oh....um.....
J: Why do you have that there?
Me: Oh! the hair?
J: yeah
Me: All big people have hair there
J: Can you get rid of it?
Me: um...No (didnt want to explain about shaving, waxing, etc to a 5 year old)
J: Please.....cause it scares me.

Then he walked away. Leaving me with my mouth wide open and speechless.

Coupons.....Today and Days of Grace

I just opened my email and found an offer for $2 off coupons for Snuggle Fabric softener. They also send me info to paste the widget on my blog and share the coupon with my followers.....Enjoy!
How Darned Cute is that Bear?!?

Ok, on to today. I woke up feeling like a truck ran over me. Stiff, tired and in some serious pain. So I missed church to stay home and take some pain meds and a nap. I was a little better this afternoon so I went to my MIL's for lunch. C stopped by in his car to give me a ride. His Dad is teaching him to drive a stick-shift and my MIL's must have been on the way. I was thrilled. Thrilled that he was doing so well after only 2 or 3 lessons and thrilled that he thought to stop and pick me up. Even if he didnt think it was a big deal, I did. Thanks C! Tonight as I was trying to wrangle my over-active little boys into bed I was thinking how they never stop running, never stop talking, never stop playing, etc. Then little Tuesday popped into my head and I was suddenly thankful that they never stop running, never stop talking and never stop playing. Isnt it amazing how quickly we lose patience with our loved ones until we hear about someone losing theirs.....it always snaps me back to reality.

Today I found Grace in....

-C taking me for a ride in his car

-Over active little boys!

-Brownies fresh from the oven

-Percocet (today was one of those days!)

-Examine and see how good the Lord is. Happy is the person who trusts him. Psalm 34:8

Days of Grace

Today I found Grace in....

-C coming home earlier than expected so he could have dinner with us tonight.

-Hubby keeping the boys outside while I laid on the couch for an hour this afternoon.

-Ice Cream in the freezer.

-Knowing how much my boys love hearing stories from their Bible at bedtime.

- Love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind and all your strength. Mark 12:30

Whiplash

Kids cause us parents lots of illnesses and injuries. From catching colds to spraining ankles on toys and everything in between. But last week was a first for me. We were in the van and J was riding in the back seat. I was in the front passenger seat. Here is what happened next....

J: Mom?
Me: Yes
J: Is it Hot in here or is it just YOU!?
This is where my head spins around like I was in the exorcist movie.....I honestly didnt know I could turn that fast.
Me: What?! Where on Earth did you hear that?!?!
J: Spongebob

Oh no....guess I need to pay more attention to what is being said on his cartoons. I dont want him saying things like that in Kindergarten in the Fall.

Friday fill in

And...here we go!

1. When I look to the left, I see a big mess.

2. The Family Room is the room that has the best view in my home.

3. Let it work quickly.

4. Nothing is done dirt cheap!

5. Helping others is a responsibility that all qualified citizens must share.

6. If you have any Chocolate feel free to share.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to C coming over, tomorrow my plans include Shopping at BJ's wholesale and Sunday, I want to go to Church!

Today....Days of Grace

So far we are 1-1....R peed on potty once and peed on floor once. He is still in big boy undies and will be until bedtime.....Im sticking to my guns. No matter how much pee I have to clean up. I have been very occupied with him today and am not feeling very creative so my Days of Grace will be replaced by funny pictures today......enjoy

-Bloggy Friends

-My awesomeness

-this one reminds me of how I feel with PMS

This is so cool...if I had enough friends I would do this

And I'm asking that you all pray for my buddy Amy. She is not feeling well and stayed home from work today. Thanks!!!

3rd time is the HARDEST....or hard-headed-est.

R is not happy with me today. I put big boy undies on him. And every so often I put him on the potty seat. So far neither of us is winning. Which I guess is kinda good. But I think I need to give him some iced tea or something that will make him HAVE to pee. Any other suggestions? I am already trying to bribe him (no remarks about that Tonya, lol) with candy and the promise of a Happy Meal.....and he is not buying it. Wish me and Ray luck on our new adventure.

Update and Days of Grace

I just have to say that I LOVED reading my comments from yesterdays post. Your Days of Grace lists were wonderful....and I plan to do that again in the future on days when Im not feeling up to blogging. Speaking of how I am feeling.... I went to my PCP today. I am officially off the Enbrel. Sigh. Now I wait to see one of my Rheumys in May and then start the Methotrexate. My PCP does not disagree with the Rheumys, but he also doesnt totally agree either. He knows the the Enbrel was helping so he can't understand why they are pushing for a change. I feel like Im in the center of a big Tug of War. And it is an uncomfortable place to be. I told him I was scared and he said he is scared for me, But he told me that he is on my side....so the second that I may feel that I want to quit the Rheumys plans for me, he will give me back my Enbrel. That is comforting, to have a backup plan. Either way, he filled my script for extra pain pills this month because we all know what is coming my way.....pain, pain and extra pain......plus enough fatigue to drag a workhorse down.
Sound like fun?! Any one want to join me?? Nah...didnt think so.

I already feel so guilty because I am so far behind on reading blogs and getting farther behind each day. Maybe someday I will catch up. Maybe.

Now on to todays Days of Grace....today I found Grace in....

-My PCP, who is standing behind me no matter what happens in the upcoming months.

-Spongebob....who is occupying my boys so I can post today.

-A nice long nap with R


oh no.....the boys need me so todays list is going to have to be cut back to 3......sorry.

You do it.....I'm Tired

Im tired and dont feel like blogging....so please feel free to comment with your own Days of Grace lists for today. I would love to read them in my comments.
Thanks!

Days of Grace

Today was great. The boys were good. We got some great deals on more clearance stuff at Walmart. The weather was beautiful so the boys played outside before lunch AND after nap. Then tonight after dinner Amy and her son J came over. We put a movie in for them but no one watched it....they played trains, cars, and every other thing that little boys play. Plus Amy and I got to talk and I found out about everything about the trip I missed this weekend.

Today I found Grace in....

-Amy and J coming over. We all had a great time and can't wait to get together again.

-Beautiful sunny weather......and tired dirty boys!

-Feeling pretty good today

-When I kept things to myself, I felt weak deep inside me. Psalm 32:3

-Give all your worries to Him, because he cares about you. 1 Peter 5:7

-

2nd !!!

I have told you before that C is on the Robotics Team. They go all over to compete (including Nationals in Georgia last spring). This past weekend was a a competition in Rochester, NY at Rochester Institute of Technology. They worked super hard during build season and made the Robot to the specifications given by FIRST. All that work Paid off.....they came in 2nd ! I am so proud and cant wait to see the medal and trophy next time C comes to visit.

I wanted to post some pics....but the only pics I have seen are on facebook and it is being finicky and not showing pics to me right now. Only goofy white boxes with red X's. So maybe later.

Happy Sunday!

Look! Spring really is coming!

I am sooooo happy to see these Daffodils. It means that these couple of warm days are a sign of good things to come. We have been outside for most of the day. The boys played in the dirt at Mommom's while Hubby and I worked in the garden tearing down dead vines, etc. (Actually I didnt do much more than follow him and talk, but that counts, right?)

After we came home the boys played in the sandbox and on the swingset while Hubby grilled porkchops and I made all the sides for our dinner. Now they are playing nicely on the living room floor. I love the time change....except in the mornings when I have to get up earlier. Like today, when I didnt get up in time and missed Church. I am TOTALLY to blame.

Ok, here is a question for ya?!? I have had some wrapped Christmas presents in my basement that are for one of my girlfriends kids. I bought them two Christmas's ago and even though I still talk to my friend, our schedules NEVER mesh and we dont see each other. So anyhoo.....Im really tired of looking at these wrapped gifts....especially since I know by now her kiddos have probably outgrown them. I asked hubby and he agreed with me and I brought one up for the boys. Do you think that is horrible? Other second part of the question is whether or not you would give your boys a Littlest Pet Shop playland?!? I know, I know....its a girls toy, but they dont care. Hubby stuck his nose up but didnt say too much. I think what I did was fine, but I still would love to hear some honest opinions....what do you think?

Today I found Grace in....

Daffodils

Dirt (that the boys were playing in)

Hearing my little ones saying prayers

Old Christmas Presents (I unwrapped some Bath and Body stuff for me, lol)

A nice long conversation with my MIL.

I hope everyone else had beautiful weather and got outside to enjoy it today.

Days of Grace....Saturday edition

Whew....I'm glad today is done. It was a good day, but another long day. Not much happened this morning but this afternoon we went to an Anniversary Party for my BIL and SIL. It was for their 25th Anniversary, and it was a surprise party. The food was good and the boys behaved. I guess we can't for more than that, right?

Today I found Grace in....

-Spending time with Family, even if it was In-Laws.

-A shiny, clean kitchen sink.

-Tonight being daylight savings time. Part of me loves it because we get more sunlight but part of me doesn't like it because now my Mom and I will be 3 hours apart (they live in AZ where they do not change their clocks for daylight savings time...what a bunch of weirdos, ROFL)

-The boys behaving at the party....even after eating a ton of candy and junkfood.

-You have made known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand. Psalm 16:11

Kreativ Blogger Award

I got tagged with this Kreativ Blogger Award by Jamie and Young Momma. Thank you so much :-)
*Here are the award rules:

List 7 things that you love and then pass the award on to 7 bloggers you love.
Be sure to tag them and let them know they have won!
You can copy the picture of the award and put it on your sideboard
letting the whole world know.....
you are KREATIV!

-I love My Hubby. He makes me happy and keeps me laughing.

-I love my Boys. All 3 of them make me so proud and so happy. Even when they are misbehaving, they still bring me joy.

-I love my friends. This includes my internet and bloggy friends. I think my brain would implode if I didnt have my friends to talk to....or blog with. I dont remember how I coped before I had this outlet, lol.

-I love blogging. Because obsessive behavior = Love, right?

-I love chocolate. Any woman who says they dont love chocolate is lying. Really.

-I love Sunflowers. Just looking at them soothes me. Cheers me up and lifts my mood.

-And most of all I love God. He saved me and has a place for me in Heaven. No one can top that.

Now for 7 Kreativ Bloggers to pass this award on to....

Kristina P.....THE MOST Kreativ woman ever to blog about Chacon and Snuggies!

Em who is very Kreativ, especially on Tuesdays and Fridays :-)

Deb who has always been Kreativ but has been going above and beyond by VLOGGING lately (is that how you spell it??)

Tonya who is my go-to friend for all things Kreativ.

Dawn because you have to be Kreativ to think up Frankenblog.

Rebecca Jo who not only is a Kreativ blogger but a Kreativ knitter too!

Quirkyloon because you have to be Kreativ to come up with that name....and her blog is super-funny too!

A little clarification, some Rambling....and Days of Grace

Yesterday I mentioned getting a months worth of groceries for $90. This is true. But I didn't mention how we already have deer and elk meat in the freezer. Plus some beef since my MIL has a cattle farm. We still buy beef, but get alot from her. One more thing is that I have really been following the meal planning tips at Cindy's Porch. She has printable forms where you take "inventory" of what you have in your fridge, freezer and pantry. Then plan meals from that first. And I have come to realize that we have lots of stuff we have overlooked. So I have been using this plan to "shop at home" first, then make lists and plan for a whole month based on sales and coupons. So that is how I got my March groceries for $90. Oh....and I will still need milk, bread and eggs (maybe even cereal) each week.
Last night I came across another very helpful meal planning site. Food Storage Made Easy. I'm not into the whole food storage for a year thing, but I love anything that helps me plan meals and save money. They have an excel program where you set up your master food list and meals and it provides shopping lists and other info. Yay!

Now. I want to talk about my hubby. Today he was wonderful. He knows I am not feeling well and has picked up the slack. Usually I don't ask for help. But today I did. I asked him to make dinner for me and he said yes. Then he bathed the boys. All while I laid on the couch. I felt so guilty, but I'm working on needed to ask for help when I need help. It is a tough habit to break. But YAY Hubby....today you Rocked!
Now I want to talk about something I read in the Bible last night. I was reading Mark 9:2-29. One part talks about a father who went to ask Jesus to heal his son. This verse jumped out at me.....like It was ME saying it. "Immediately the father cried out, "I Do Believe! Help me to believe more!" (Mark 9:24)
Wow....I can totally relate. God gives us all spiritual gifts. When I was younger my church did a study on this to help us all figure out what our gifts were. I know that God blessed me with the gift of Faith. I have an unshakable Faith. Nothing can be said or done to make me doubt God or Jesus. Period. I'm very lucky with that. Many people struggle with doubts and what to believe. I feel like my Faith is hard-wired into my brain. So back to the verse, As much as I have a strong Faith and I KNOW God can do ANYTHING. I have a problem with trusting that he WILL do stuff. Did I lose you? For example....I know God can heal people. But I also know that he will only heal a person IF it is His will. So I know He CAN, but I don't always know that he WILL. So I can relate to this verse. That father believes but wants help to believe more. I believe but need help believing that prayers will be answered. I guess I need to let go of the things I want God to do and be happy with what He has planned.

Today I found Grace in

-Hubby (see above (-: )

-a nap

-Percocet

-A back rub from J

-Hubby....he was so awesome he deserves to be mentioned twice <3

Today.....Days of Grace

Today was a good day. Tonight was not a good night. Not that anything BAD happened. I just over did it today and I am suffering for it. I feel terrible because the boys were begging me to play and I just couldn't. After a dentist visit, a trip to the grocery store and making dinner I was completely wiped out. Zip. Zero. Nothing left to give. I hate that. I hate that my kids have to be told No, sorry, cant play now. They are still young and don't understand. They know that Mommy goes to doctors all the time and that she doesn't feel good most of the time. But I think they see more of the negative than the positive. The thought of them growing up remembering all the times I didn't or couldn't spend time with them breaks my heart. Ok, I didn't set out to complain or whine.....lets head in a new direction. Think positive thoughts. Hmmmmmm.....Hubby might have Saturday off. That's good. Tomorrow our DirecTV dish is getting replaced. Our dish and boxes are about 10 years old and are slowly dying. What else is good? You guys. Yep. You guys are good.....especially since I didn't read one single blog today or comment. And you still love me. Yay!
Alright, I'm off to list my D.o.G. and then head to bed. I am Exhausted.

Today I found Grace in....

-More comments supporting my whiny post about being sick. Thanks again!

-Knowing that I can stay home ALL day tomorrow and take a nap right after lunch.

-Getting a months worth of groceries for $90. Our local store has these HUGE one day sales every once in awhile and we STOCKED UP.

-More magazines in the mailbox today. Yay....I love mail!

-God. Actually I find Grace in God everyday.....but I wanted to give Him a little shout out <3

Days of Grace

I am so overwhelmingly thankful for all the support I got today on my earlier post. I love each and every one of you and wish I could HUG each of you. So today I found Grace in.....

-All my bloggy friends and the love and friendship they show me daily.

-A trip to the kitchen store. We love the kitchen store and all the gadgets, utensils and appliances. We did more browsing than anything, but that is always nice too.

-Talking to my dad on the phone. I dont get to do that much. Not much at all. So hearing his voice was wonderful.

-Signing J up for his first season of T-ball. Yay!

- More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope. Romans 5:3-4

Health Class 101

I decided to just bite the bullet. Write it and post it....no looking back. So here it is. A nice, neater version of my life. There is more details but you don't need to read them, not yet anyway. And I am only doing this because I believe this is cheaper than therapy. You are my therapist. My support system. You have my back, right? I can whine and complain and you will still love me, right? Gee, I hope so. We have a long couple months ahead.....

Remember in High School Health class when you learned about the Immune System? It's the part of your body that attacks outside stuff like germs, bacteria, etc. In most people it does a nice, quiet job and no one even notices it. But not me. I have an Auto-Immune Disease, which means my body attacks itself. I have Sjogrens, which is like Lupus's drier cousin. I say drier because it attacks your moisture producing glands first. In some (most?) people it stops there. Some people just have dry eyes or dry mouth. Not me. I hit the jackpot. Mine affects my entire body. And Sjogrens brought along its bald-headed step child Fibromyalgia to the party. Yay me! Ugh. So what does this mean for me. Pain, lots of pain and disabling fatigue. Think Mono....but WAY worse. In the 2 1/2 years since I got sick I now have slight eye damage, have lost 5 teeth (when your mouth is dry it decays your teeth at a very fast rate), arthritis in just about every joint, unbearable fatigue and pain. Muscle pain and joint pain. EVERYWHERE. I spend all day everyday in pain. It sucks.

Now....for my upcoming treatment changes. Currently I am on million and one different pills each day. ok, maybe not that many but close. I also take Enbrel shots twice a week. I started these back in September and they have helped. They have lifted a lot of my brain fog and eased the fatigue. I still have to nap everyday and pace myself but I can see a difference. Woo hoo...right? Wrong! My Rheumatologist is taking me off. My PCP jumped the gun when he put me on it and my Rhemy is NOT HAPPY. So next week I go to my PCP and stop the Enbrel. Then I have to wait nearly 2 months before my next appointment. Where I will be starting Methotrexate. Which is a cancer drug. And it scares me. I am hopeful that it might help. But I am still scared. Scared that it wont help. Scared that it will, but I will also loose my hair. And I am totally petrified of my nearly 2 months without Enbrel before I start the Methotrexate. Before Enbrel I could barely function. So what happens after I come off?

One more issue to throw in this mix. I have the big E. Which is mostly controlled. Mostly. But when I started Enbrel it threw my body for a loop....and I had 3 seizures. So now what? Will I have more when I come off? Will the Methotrexate cause any? So many questions.

Me....abbreviated

The other day in a PMS induced whine session I wrote a blog. A very long blog. About myself. I didnt post it and I just deleted it. It was about me....but it wasn't me. Sorry if that seems cryptic. That blog explained some stuff about me that I haven't explained up to now. But it was boring and boo-hoo-ish (is that a word??). I think that I am not generally a complainer (ok, hubby would argue about that one) and don't usually go around blabbing about my health. But I have some major changes coming soon in my treatment and I think blogging will be a good way to alleviate some illness-induced stress....so I may actually give you the run-down.


Soon.
Just not yet.

Another snow day....and Days of Grace

I missed Tribute Tuesday again. I am such a slacker. But Hubby is home and we all took a nap this afternoon then headed outside to play in the snow. So can I get a pass this week? PLEASE? thanks.

Here is a pic of Hubby....all bundled up.

Snow loving J...ready to play


R bundled up more than anyone else....because he HATES the cold, just like Mommy.




I'm not quite sure why these last pics are smaller, but they did come from a different camera. I love the one of Hubby and R sledding together. We really had a great time....and I had more fun today than I did yesterday.

Now here is my Days of Grace list. Today I found Grace in....

-a care package from Mom and Dad. A big box full of goodies, chocolate, toys, book, and a flat iron for my hair. THANKS Mom and Dad! Love you!!

-the smell of cake baking in the oven

-Hubby making dinner.....if he would only do dishes then tonight would be PERFECT, lol.

-knowing the boys are exhausted and will fall asleep super-fast tonight.

-My new book "Spiritual Mothering. The Titus 2 Model for Women Mentoring Women" by Susan Hunt.

Days of Grace and Snow Pics

Today was a good day. Even if I half froze to death. Here are a few pics that Hubby took of the boys. Please ignore that pic of me....no one looks good in THAT many layers.

J is making a snow angel. This is the closest he has ever come to being Angelic...just kidding!


Days of Grace....Today I found Grace in...

-Freshly fallen snow

-A 2 hour Nap

-A hot shower

-Homemade Snow Ice cream and KettleKorn (Hubby made the Korn)

-The Lord Blesses his people with peace. Psalm 29:11

Snow Day

Well, the storm hit and we ended up with about 7 inches of snow. We can't tell exactly because we have strong winds that have caused Big drifts. Either way, it is enough for the boys to have a BALL! After lunch we all bundled up and headed out. Hubby cleared the walk and driveway while the boys tried sledding down the hill in our front yard. Later on we all went out back. Hubby wanted to get a few pics of our pond with all the snow covering. He was in such a hurry to get back there that he missed the BEST and FUNNIEST moment that we should have caught on video and/or pictures. R was following all of us, moving at his usual slow pace.....and he started calling for us. I turned and saw him waist deep in a snow drift. He was stuck and yelling"Help! I cant make it! Help!" It was darned cute! So I went and helped him out and we met Hubby back by the pond. After that we (except Hubby who still had some shoveling to do) went in the house to get warm. This is the first time the boys didn't want Hot Chocolate after we came in, and I still don't know why. When Hubby was done working outside I sent him back out to get a big bowl full of snow to make Snow Ice Cream.
R was too busy watching an Elmo movie (and too tired to move) to help us. So J and I mixed and stirred and made the yummy frozen treat. Turns out only me and J ate the stuff too. Hubby said it was too sweet. And R stayed laying on the couch and had no interest in getting up for something cold, lol.
I thought it was pretty tasty....especially after it melted just a little bit. It was similar to Ice Milk, if you have ever had that. Yum!
Snow Ice Cream
--------------
-Big Bowl of clean Snow
-can of Evaporated milk
-3/4 cup white Sugar
-teaspoon vanilla extract
Mix ingredients together and pour onto ice cream. Mix completely and enjoy.

Sunday and Days of Grace

Today is the calm before the storm. Literally. We are expected to get up to 10 inches of snow or more tonight. Crap. I hate snow. Thankfully Hubby doesn't go into work until tomorrow night so he will be home all day to shovel and play with the boys outside. Then maybe I can stay inside and stay warm. Wish me luck.
This morning J had to stay home from church after throwing such a HUGE temper tantrum in church last week. But R still went with me. He is so different from J. J spends every second of his life on full-speed. Even his emotions are on high. But R, he is calm and quiet. He is a thinker, a plotter. You can see his mind working....and sometimes I would love to know what is going through his mind.

Today I found Grace in....

-seeing the ground for the last time for a least a few days. When I get up tomorrow morning it will all be covered in snow. Lots and lots of snow.

-a nice lunch at my MIL's. She makes a big meal every Sunday for the family. I love her.

-Hubby doing my laundry this morning....I just wonder if he remembered to put them in the dryer???

-The boys playing quietly upstairs this afternoon.

-And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love, lives in God and God in him. I John 4:16